Friday, November 5, 2010

Earnestness.

Who has two thumbs and had the best concert experience of her life last night?

THIS GIRL.

The Lincoln Center Atrium has free performances on Thursdays, and last night the ticket was the Fish Police and the Terror Pigeon Dance Revolt! (the exclamation point is part of their name). The ... Other Musician (the ... friend-who-I-guess-I'm-kind-of-dating-now? the ... fuck it he's the Dükling for reasons of an inside joke that I might explain later if this entry doesn't get stupid-long) and I went in to check it out, expecting the usual nonsense you get at Lincoln Center (opera! smooth jazz! mariachi!) but instead we got the TERROR PIGEON DANCE REVOLT!.

Honestly everything was so awesome that the music was almost incidental. I was describing the show to my roommate this morning and he was like, "sounds like a two year old's concert," and my response was, "SO?!" because, well, SO?! So what if we were encouraged to put on the costumes they brought! So what if the set was those hokey flags people hang outside their summer homes all sewn together! So what if there were thirteen blazers all strung together with Christmas lights and we put them on and ran around the atrium holding hands while the lights blinked in time with the music! SO IT WAS AWESOME.

"It was the happiest I've ever been without chemical enhancement. I felt so happy that it was like I was rolling, but I was completely sober," the Dükling told his roommates last night. I was still bouncing. Totally sober! Totally joyful! Fuck irony and detachment and being above it all; I had the time of my life.

They're performing again somewhere in the city on Saturday and I am trying to collect every single person I know to go see them because fuck, man, it was transcendentally ecstatically fantastic.

Also the Dükling is pretty great but we've been friends for like a year so I already knew that.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Restructuring.

So it's been a while since my last update, and a lot of things have happened. Externally and internally.

Externally, I've gotten some flak for my last blog, the majority of which is valid -- that I shared things that should not have been for public consumption, and which I regret airing. It was, as my ex said, "not classy." Other criticisms are less valid, but I won't get into that now.

Additionally, I'm learning the value of having secrets. I always thought that there was something wrong with having secrets, that it made you dishonest in a way to not share all of who you were with those closest to you, but I've learned the difference between having secrets and being secretive. I've also learned that it's not a pleasant feeling to walk into a room and feel that you're living the nightmare of walking into your high school classroom butt-naked. Sharing your secrets makes you vulnerable, and being vulnerable is something you must choose to be on a person-by-person basis.

Finally, I have learned that the value of a Saturday night on the couch with whiskey and friends and bad network procedural dramas is impossible to overestimate.

So, moving forward, I will endeavor to be open but not vulnerable, to be honest but not to pull open my ribcage, to tell the truth but not to open the truth up for public debate. And to always take time out for Makers Mark, friends, and Castle.

I guess it's my resolutions, two months ahead of time.